Shout-Out To The Cycle Breakers

Shout-Out To The Cycle Breakers

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.

They may not mean to, but they do.

They fill you with the faults they had

And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn

By fools in old-style hats and coats,

Who half the time were soppy-stern

And half at one another’s throats.

Man hands on misery to man.

It deepens like a coa...

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What’s The Most Effective Therapy For Self Esteem?

Why Does Self Acceptance Get Such A Bad Rap?

The importance of a healthy level of self-esteem cannot be underestimated:  it determines our worth, value and right to have our legitimate needs met.  It is the ability to set boundaries, attract and maintain healthy relationships, and recognise that we will not abandon ourselves simply for the sake of belonging.  It is a sense of being rooted in ourselves, and recognising intuitively when someone,  or something, is not in our best interests coupled with the ability to act on this gnosis and withdraw if necessary.

Self-esteem becomes our guidance system, our inner compass, to navigate our way through life as well.   We cannot control what happens to us in life but with good self esteem we can learn to sail in high seas.


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AI Therapy Is Artificial In More Ways Than You Think

AI Therapy

You’ve probably never heard of Joseph Weizenbaum, a German American computer science professor at the world renowned Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT). You’ve probably never heard of ELIZA, either – the computer programme he created to demonstrate that machines could not replicate talking mental health therapy.

At least, that was the intention. But as students of his work would be quick to tell you, that’s not quite how things worked out.

Let’s rewind a little. The Sixties is now recognised as having been a hothouse of new trends and new ideas. Not just around fashion, music and film, but also in social consciousness (this is the age of peace and love and antiwar sentiment, after all) and in technological advancement.



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Unlocking The Potential Of Love: Connecting Beyond Dating Apps

Love In Real Life

In a world increasingly dominated by dating apps and swiping right, we often forget to look within our own circles for potential romantic connections. Friends of friends, colleagues, neighbours, or even familiar faces from the local shop or train can hold the key to unexpected connections and blossoming love stories. Shifting our perspective and seeing the people around us in a new light can yield many benefits and open up avenues for genuine connections.

Exploring the Uncharted Territory

Seeing someone you already know in a romantic light may seem daunting, but it can lead to beautifully unexpected outcomes. Before you embark on this journey, consider a few crucial points:


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So You Want To Be A Star?

Screenshot 2023 08 05 At 17.45.44

When the news of Sinead O’Connor’s death broke in the evening of the last Wednesday of July, it was a painful reminder that fame – even when the height of it is long distant – comes at a high emotional price.

Her death will be processed no differently to the sudden and unexpected death of any other UK resident: a postmortem followed by a coroner’s investigation. 

The autopsy will already have been performed. If the cause of death is found to have been natural, she will be laid to rest in accordance her expressed wishes within a matter of just a few weeks.

And it is, of course, entirely possible that the singer succumbed to some sudden illness or catastrophic health event.

But as any journalist will tell yo


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Why Would Someone Need A Sex Coach?

Sex Coaching

If you have come across this blog, you may be looking for some answers to ongoing sexual challenges or unmet sexual needs. Or you may be curious about what sex coaching actually is. If so, read on, because we are going to dive into what exactly sex coaching is and how it could support you in your journey to sexual satisfaction.

As a sex coach, I see clients who are at different stages in life, from people who have been married for 20 years to single people wanting a partnership to those dating and wanting to improve their sexual performance. For some, they may not have had any therapy before and are wanting to start with a practical approach from the onset. For others, they may have already had talk therapy, and although they have come


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The Culture Wars And The Narcissism Of Extremism

The Culture Wars

The comedian and actor John Cleese has an interesting take on extremism, arguing that what some people see as extremism in those they perceive as enemies can often be used to justify their own equally extremist reactions to it. “You can be as nasty as you like and feel your behaviour is morally justified”. 

In other words, extremism begets extremism – it’s just that our own certainty that we are right and ‘they’ are wrong risks blinding us to the fact our own behaviour is no less extreme.

Extremist ideology of whatever nature blooms in closed networks of ideological echo chambers (like internet chatrooms,


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Doesn’t Everyone Have Autism And ADHD Now?

ADHD coaching

I think I’ve heard this statement (it’s never meant as a question) in every possible format now: on the socials, from personal contacts, in the backlash from the recent Panorama investigation into how clinics are diagnosing the condition ( and in workplaces.

Most uncomfortably and personally, I endured a version of it in the form of a 30 minute verbal attack by my Uber driver whose starting and finishing position on the subject pretty much boiled down to: “You don’t have ADHD, you just say you do because it looks good for your clients – ‘Oh, look I can be like her. She has it’”.

I sometimes wish people w


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The Matrix Ate My Homework – Are Influencers The New Cults?

the matrix ate my homework

The world has known its fair share of cult leaders. From Charles Manson and David Koresh and R. Kelly, history is punctuated by the coercive and often deadly activities of individuals who just happened to be in the right place at the right time to tap into extremism’s zeitgeist.

Predominantly male (of the 68 cult leaders deemed worthy of their own page on Wikipedia, only 8 are women – though what they lack in number as leaders they seem to more than make up for in body count of victims), cult leaders trade on charisma, manipulation, and the creation of a strong sense of community and belonging.

It seemed for a while that organised cults that tended to exist in or gravitate toward communes – primarily a phenomenon of the Fifties, Sixties, Seventies and


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Mind The Pleasure Gap

Mind The Pleasure Gap

“I feel like I live my life at 60%. I know there’s a lot more happiness out there that I’m sure I could have, but I’d probably also have to feel more of the downside of everything, too.”

 You know those bad days that we all have from time to time, when we feel hemmed in by life and nothing seems to be going our way? And we’re wallowing in self-pity, wondering why everyone else seems to be having it so good? Don’t be shy – we’ve all been there.

Those are the days when you think you couldn’t feel any more downbeat about the track your life is currently on, an expensive car pulls up to the kerb, the door opens and the person who gets out looks exactly like you thought you should have been by


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